Welcome to the MARRIAGE MART
Your guide to dating and engagement—God's way. For every girl who's loved, lost, or is ready for something real—this is for you
♬ ♪♬ ♫ Here comes the brideeeeee, all cloaked in wisdommmmmmm ♪♬ ♫♪♬ ♫♪♪
Welcome to Marriage Mart, where we’re setting the ultimate ground rules for dating and getting engaged—God’s way. These aren’t just rules; they’re wisdom straight from the heart of the Father, guaranteed to guide you through the ups and downs of love.
When I stumbled across these principles, my entire love life transformed. I’m old enough to have lived through the dating app explosion—2018 to 2019, anyone? Swiping left and right until it all got exhausting. Now, I only want a man who fears God, and I’m done settling for anything less, even if it feels like everyone around me is moving on with engagements and weddings.
Let’s just say, my self-imposed "nun status" taught me a lot (with all due respect to actual nuns). I’ve watched friends and internet people alike make all kinds of mistakes when it comes to love, my old self included. That’s when I decided to commit—fully commit—to doing it God’s way. I saw social media fill with 'love experts' preaching about being 'high value' or mastering the 'talking stage,' blah blah blah siren eyes this black cat that—but, girl, the Holy Spirit showed me what was really behind those teachings (it wasn't good, it definitely wasn't great).
When I finally surrendered to God’s way—because true freedom is found in letting go—I discovered a treasure trove of wisdom. And now, I’m sharing it with you all month long. Consider this your early holiday gift. God’s wisdom will save you from years of heartbreak, uncertainty, and playing games. Trust me, you don’t want to miss this—it could change everything for you.
This is the end all be all guide for dating, getting engaged, understanding men, and navigating relationships with clarity. I’m here to give you the cheat codes from Heaven. And when your season comes and that love finds you, because it will, don’t forget to send me that wedding invite!!
MARRIAGE MART LESSON ONE
1. Let Yourself Be Seen, But Don’t Chase
You’ve got to put yourself out there. He’s not going to find you if you’re always home, nestled in your comfort zone. Get out—meet friends for coffee, take a walk, explore new places. You’re not going to find something amazing without making an effort. Think of it like finding the perfect vintage piece—you've got to search a bit.
2. Be Busy Building Your Life
This isn’t about orbiting around someone else’s plans. Focus on what lights you up—your growth, your goals, your friendships. A well-lived life is magnetic, and the right person will naturally be drawn to you. But remember, you need a world of your own for someone to step into. No one was designed to be someone else’s entire universe, and that includes you. Build a life you love, and the rest will follow.
3. Keep Your Mystery Sacred
Not everyone deserves access to every part of you right away. Let your story unfold gradually—let them earn it. It’s not about playing games; it’s about respecting your own depth. Hold back a little. No one needs your entire life story on the first date...or second...or third. Like relax.
4. Value Virtue Over Validation
Looks might catch his attention, but character will keep his heart. Focus on being someone with real values and genuine grace. Someone who is grounded in virtue leaves a lasting impression. How you feel about yourself matters more than how you look—though both play a role. But at the end of the day, character wins every time.
5. Don’t Act Like His Wife Until You Are
Giving him all your time, energy, and care before he’s made a real commitment doesn’t make him stay—it just makes him comfortable. Be warm and caring, sure, but don’t forget to keep your standards. Respect yourself enough to know where the line is. If I catch you cooking for him I will call the police.
6. Respect His Biological Need to Pursue
Let him show you his interest through actions, not just words. Giving him the space to pursue you honors both his intentions and your worth. This isn’t about playing games—it’s about giving the relationship time to reveal what it really is, not what you're hoping it becomes in your head. Remember, if he’s truly interested, he’ll make it known through his actions, repeatedly.
7. Just Be Yourself
Stop trying to impress or fit into anyone’s box. Just be you—fully, unapologetically. It’s your authenticity that makes you unforgettable, especially when everyone else is busy trying to blend in. If he doesn’t click with who you are, that’s your sign. Move on.
8. Know That You Are Worthy of a Love That Doesn’t Make You Question Your Worth
Love should be peaceful, not filled with doubt. If he’s the right one, you’ll feel secure, valued, and cherished—not because he says so, but because his actions show it. End of story.
9. Don’t Be Afraid to Walk Away
If it feels wrong, it is. Walking away isn’t losing—it’s making room for something better. Trust that God’s timing is always bigger than any momentary setback or perceived forfeiting.
10. Hold Back Just Enough
Not everyone deserves your whole story right away. It’s not about being secretive; it’s about knowing your worth and honoring your experiences. Share parts of yourself with those who truly earn it. Protect what matters most—your loved ones and your sense of self. Not everyone gets the full access pass on day one.
11. Let Go of the Need to Control
God’s timing isn’t always on our schedule—and that’s perfectly okay. Letting go creates the space for the kind of love that’s meant for you: aligned, peaceful, and just right.
12. Celebrate the Woman You’re Becoming
Every step you take, every lesson you learn, is shaping your story. Celebrate that growth, and let it shine through. The right person will see and love the beauty in who you’re becoming. You don’t need to have it all figured out—just keep moving forward.
13. Keep Your Standards as High as Your Faith
Don’t lower your standards just because you're feeling impatient or worried about being alone. What you want isn’t too much if it aligns with the life and love you envision for yourself. Settling will only lead to regret—stay true to what you know you deserve.
14. Don’t Be Afraid to Ask Questions That Matter
Get comfortable having those real, sometimes awkward conversations. You need to know who he is and what his plans are—because you’re not here for small talk and surface-level vibes. Make sure he’s on his own journey with God, actively pursuing his purpose. You deserve someone who knows where they’re going and wants you along for the ride.
15. Remember: Your Love Is Not a Prize to Be Won; It’s a Gift to Be Cherished
Think of your love as a gift—not something to be earned by anyone and everyone. When you see it this way, you become more discerning about who gets your time, attention, and affection. Not everyone deserves the full package that is you. Sure, love everyone, but be intentional about who gets your heart. Save it for someone who truly sees its worth.
16. Be Rooted in Your Own Peace
Never let someone else's presence—or absence—shake your inner peace. When you know who you are and who God says you are, love is just an addition to your life, not the entire foundation. Build your own solid ground first.
17. Trust That God Is Preparing You for the Love That’s Worth the Wait
What feels like a delay might actually be the setup for something amazing. Trust the process. Stop sitting around waiting—live your best life now. The right person will come, and when they do, you'll still be your own person, just part of something bigger.
18. Pray for Wisdom, Not Just Love
Pray for the clarity to see what’s real and lasting. Love is beautiful, but it’s wisdom that makes it last. You want the man God has for you, not just anyone. God’s man will help bring out the best version of you, the version of you that God wants to show the world.
That's it for today, boo.
Take these lessons to heart!!
share them with your friends, and remember—foolishness never looks good on anyone. You're in the know now.
Until next week, stay wise. Selah.
Zozo