The Only Status Symbol That Matters
and the 5 things it gets you
Be grateful or PIE!
(this is no way in support of Blake Lively irl, this is simply the best Thanksgiving episode ever produced and tomorrow is the day referenced).
Release ‘em.
You’ve done so much, give yourself 5 days to do less! The world will continue moving without you exerting effort, if you think it’ll be hard to do, just think about how the Jesus gives breath to your body everyday, wakes you up, tucks you in, and does it all over again, without your input.
Take the time to rest because rest makes you hotter, at the end of the day. Happy Thanksgiving, I’m so grateful for you. To the OGs thanks for being here all this time, we are soulmates, and to my new friends welcome to the most loving family you’ve ever been a part of. I’m so glad you’re here.
Letter from the EditorThe Only Status Symbol that Matters
Your Weekly Affirmations
What You Missed on From Love Itself TV
Gift Guide for the Pinterest loving Kindle obsessed homebody in your life
So I’ve been thinking about status symbols. Why we want them. What we think they’ll get us. The bag. The car. The title. The house(s). We chase these things because we think they’ll make us feel a certain way. Secure. Chosen. Attractive. Like we’ve arrived. You know what I mean?
But, most status symbols don’t actually get you anything except the symbol itself. You get the bag. You want another soon after. You get the title. It does nothing for you. You get the apartment or house and once the thrill expires, it just becomes the place you live.
So then the question becomes. Is there a status symbol that actually delivers? That gets you the things you were chasing all the other stuff for?
And I think there is. I really do.
It’s a regulated nervous system.
Which basically means. Your body finally feels safe. You’re not in survival mode anymore. Not bracing for the next thing to go wrong. Not running on stress and cortisol and chaos. You’re actually here. Actually present. Actually available for your life. And when that shifts? Everything else follows!
Here’s the thing about attraction. It’s not about who you want. It’s about what you’re broadcasting.
When you’re walking around guarded, protecting yourself with the emotional imprints of everything that happened to you, you attract people who are a match for that. For the wound. For the wall. Not for who you actually are underneath it.
You can’t attract the love you want while you’re still dressed in what hurt you.
Regulate your system, and you stop leading with your wounds. You start showing up as yourself. And the people meant for her? They can finally find you because just as you’ll become visible to you, subconsciously, in the world of the unseen (the Spirit!) you’ll become visible to them.
Call it influence. Call it “it factor.” Call it whatever you want I don’t care.
But when your nervous system is regulated, people are drawn to you. Not because you’re performing or being what they expect, but because you’re present. You’re not scanning the room or rehearsing what to say next. You’re actually there. And that’s rare right now. That’s attractive. People want to be around someone who feels safe to be around.
Because you’ll stop acting from anxiety and start providing value from security.
When you know who you are, and Whose you are, you stop shrinking. You stop undercharging or accepting what you’ve charged in the past. Even if you don’t own a business, you’re still charging, you set your rate when you signed your offer letter.
Anyway you stop over-apologizing for your gifts. You bring something to the table that dysregulated people can’t: peace. Steadiness. Capacity. Awareness of what’s inside of you. And that’s valuable. People pay for that. Opportunities find that.
When you’re not surviving anymore, your heart turns outward.
You stop asking “how do I get?” and start asking “how do I give?” Remember King Solomon? What did he ask for? Wisdom. To do what? SERVE (face). It starts feeling like overflow. You create from love. You connect from love. You move through the world from love.
And honestly? That’s the whole point.
Not because you punish yourself into a routine! But because taking care of yourself becomes something you actually want to do.
When your system is dysregulated, self-care feels like another task. That’s why you always want a break from it (inconsistency much?) Another should. But when you feel safe in your body? You want to nourish it. Move it. Rest it. Adorn it. It stops being discipline and starts being desire. I’m learning this now, and I used to think I was just really into discipline but it was more like a cry for help from the girl who wasn’t ashamed of who she was. More on this in the weeks to come.
Q: Scale of 1 - 10 how regulated is your nervous system?
I only have one gear and its forward baby
I am happy like a rainbow
I am miss make it happen don’t worry captain
About This Episode: You’re a 15/10 in one city and a 2/10 in another. Pretty privilege is real but so is pre-rejecting yourself before anyone else can. This is about the shrek effect, studying yourself as data, and why God made you beautiful on purpose.
Four Seasons Robe / 2026 Planner / Aritzia Triangle Scarf / Hair Perfume / Kindle Cover / Sandy Liang Slippers
Even if you’re not her, you know exactly how she’ll respond to last minute (or in advance) plans. Here’s how to lure her out of her curated abode.
Promise her a robe, that’ll change her life, like this Four Seasons one, made of 100% Velour Jacquard Cotton aka, super soft, super luxurious feeling, better than your average cotton or terry robe.
Or, if that doesn’t work, try popping this planner into a gift bag, she’ll instantly feel like filling it with dates of all sorts.
In the same vein, honorable mention for this triangle scarf, maybe she’s cold?
But in the event you can’t draw her out of her cozy setting, get her this hair perfume, a case for that Kindle that’ll make her think of you, or these slippers that may remind her that whether or not she chooses to be a winter social butterfly or not, you love her anyway.
Beauty pillow / Marble lighter / Pajama top + bottom / MANGO bag / Nadri earrings
It’s either she’s your best friend, mentor, mother, sister, or some kind of mix of the four. Here’s what to get her.
I’ve heard nothing but good things about this Nurse Jamie pillow, we figure she’d be concerned about her neck’s alignment and we don’t blame her. Apparently facial symmetry has everything to do with how you sleep, and little to do with genetics.
How cute is this marble lighter? You never know when you need to light something on quickly and with style.
If she’s practical, she doesn’t play about sleep either, get her these 100% silk washable pajamas (top and bottom), if she doesn’t own (several) sets already, you’ll be contributing to her efficiency which is basically her love language.
There’s nothing more necessary than a basic blag bag that holds everything, is inconspicuous, and instantly puts anything together. This one from MANGO gives me Zendaya after being freed from the cuffs of her Disney contract, her Spiderman arc, and her happy life in London. Very practical.
And finally, she probably takes great care to not mishandle her diamonds after almost losing them after a Solidcore class (not a great experience), these are so unique and so beautiful, if she happens to lose them she might mourn them more than the real thing.
