You are overthinking everything, and you're probably scared to even admit it. I don't know about you, but I've been thinking about this whole concept of being yourself but way less performative about it.
If you have a history of people pleasing, and some of us definitely do, you generally tend to do things with people's probable opinion in your mind. You have it in the back of your mind: what will this person think of me? What will this person think of me?
You filter your decisions through the lens of everybody else instead of yourself, and I think that's just so lame and so stupid. Why would you do that? You deserve to make your own decisions and be your own person. Even down to what shoes! You’ll wear! On your own two feet!
The Awareness of Being Perceived Is a Prison
What does this say about my brand? What does this say about the way I look? What does this say about how I'll smell? What does this say about my overall cohesion? It's just the prison of people pleasing.
The prison of people pleasing doesn't even feed you, by the way. It's one of those old prisons where not only are you hungry, not only do you leave emaciated, not only are you always crying and sad and depleted inside of it, but you also have the key in your hand.
You have the ability to check yourself out of this prison at any time, at any moment. The reason why so many people don't is because it's all you've ever known, it's all you've ever seen. You think that if you leave the prison of people pleasing, you can't survive. You don't trust yourself. You don't believe you have it in you to do what you think you want to do, or be the person that God created you to be.
But you have it in you, a hundred percent. You are a person. You have the right to exist. You have the right to live your life the way that you want to live your life in Christ. You have the right to be who God created you to be.
Just Be Who God Made
You don't have to be the best singer to be a singer. You don't have to be the best writer to be a writer. Just be who God told you you are. You don't need the validation of other people in your freedom.
Letting yourself be who God created you to be IS your freedom. That is your get-out-of-jail-free card. You'll be out of the prison. You'll never see that prison again in Jesus' name because you'll let yourself be free.
Think about the kid version of you. The younger version of you literally just wants to live. She wants to live. She wants to breathe. She wants to make art. She wants to play. She wants to hang out. She wants to have friends. She wants to be accepted. She wants to be loved.
If you can't do those things for that version of you, who do you think can? What are you waiting for? To become what you need to be for you? Because God is already it for you, and He's expecting you to operate in His image when you're here.
Know that it's enough for you to be who you are and be who God made you to be. Use the gifts that He gave you.
Three Ways to Break Free
1. Stop filtering everything through everyone else's opinions When you catch yourself asking "what will they think," just stop. Ask yourself what YOU think instead. Your opinion of your own life matters most.
2. Remember you have the key to your own prison You can check out of people pleasing any time you want. You don't need permission from anyone. You already have everything you need inside you to make your own decisions.
3. Honor the bbg version of yourself That little girl inside just wants to live authentically and be loved for who she is. If you won't give her that freedom, who will?
You deserve to make choices based on what feels right for you, not what looks good to everyone else. Your authenticity is your gift to the world, not your performance.
Let yourself be.
1. I am enough as I am and I get better and better every day.
2. I’m already living the life I dreamed about.
3. I get everything I want.
reading 📖: The Heir by Sophie Travers
eating 🥗: cinnamon rice cakess
playing 🎧: Killing Sacred Cows 2.0 by Garrett Gunderson on Audible
obsessing 🤠: Becca Bloom’s Wedding bc omg
recommending 💌: gatekeep a lil lol
treating 🌟: Girl of Now by Elie Saab
The Definitive Ranking of Press-On Nails
OK, so this is my definitive ranking of press-on nails. I haven't gotten my nails done - I'll get my nails done for maintenance like my fingernails every two months because I use my own cuticle remover (I use the Sally Hansen cuticle remover), but sometimes a professional is a professional for a reason, so I'll go for that reason.
Letter From Moi
Whatever it is it’s really not that serious, but if you were to ask me on a deeper level, how serious it is, I would tell you that, you know, um, it's not. So do with that information what you will. I hope you have the best week ever.. Yeah, and happy September.
this. 🥹