5 Ways to Have a Self-Centered Summer (And Why Your Future Self Will Thank You)
let's talk shall we
Picture THISSSSS girl: You're about to post that sunset photo from your evening walk, but you pause. Will people think I post too much? Will I lose followers? Should I just keep this moment to myself?
What if I told you that the most transformative thing you could do this summer is to become completely, unapologetically self-centered?
Not in a selfish way, but in a way that honors who you're becoming. We've heard about decentering men and decentering beauty standards, but what about decentering what people think entirely?
This summer, it's time to remember that you are the masterpiece everyone comes to see. You are the main character of your own story, and every other person is simply a supporting character in the beautiful movie of your life.
1. Remember: You Are the Main Character
Think of your life as your favorite movie. Everything revolves around the main character's journey, growth, and transformation. The supporting characters are important, but they exist to enhance the main storyline, not dictate it.
You are that main character. Your storyline should dictate everyone else's role in your life, not the other way around.
When you step into this truth, you stop shrinking yourself to fit into someone else's vision of who you should be.
Instead of: Asking "What will people think?" when making decisions
Do this: Ask yourself "What would the main character of this story do?" The answer is usually the one that feels most authentic to who you're becoming.
2. Understand That People Pleasing Is an Illusion like National Debt
People pleasing isn't actually taking responsibility for your life. It's avoiding the only responsibility that truly matters, responsibility to yourself.
Many of us learned people pleasing as a protection mechanism. Maybe you experienced rejection or abandonment, and you thought, "If I can just be what people want, I'll never be hurt again." While this came from a place of self-preservation, it's actually keeping you from the very acceptance you're seeking.
People can only accept what you show them. If you're constantly showing them a version of yourself that isn't really you, they're accepting that false version—not the real you.
Instead of: Trying to control what people think of you
Do this: Focus on showing up authentically, knowing that the right people will love the real you because authenticity attracts authenticity. When you're genuine, you naturally draw people who share your values and energy.
3. Document Your Life for YOUUU OMG, Not Others
Remember when you used to love taking pictures and sharing moments without worrying about likes or follows? It's time to return to that pure joy of capturing your life.
Your Instagram story, your photos, your posts these are your digital archives.
Years from now, you'll scroll through and remember that perfect latte, that beautiful sunset, that silly moment with friends. These memories belong to you, not to the opinions of people who might not even be in your life anymore.
Instead of: Worrying about losing followers or getting judgment for your posts
Do this: Document your summer however you please and post that story.
Your future self will thank you for preserving these memories, regardless of how many people double-tap or unfollow.
4. Set Boundaries Without Explanation
This is where the magic happens. Boundaries aren't walls they're guidelines for how you want to be treated and how you want to show up in the world.
You don't need to announce your boundaries or justify them to anyone. You simply need to maintain them with quiet confidence. If a social gathering drains you, you can politely decline. If a conversation doesn't align with your values, you can redirect or step away.
Setting boundaries shows the world (and yourself tbh) that you can be trusted to take care of your own needs. This builds the kind of self-confidence that becomes magnetic.
Instead of: Over-explaining or justifying your choices to others
Do this: Choose one area where you need better boundaries and practice maintaining it this week. Simply honor your needs without elaborate explanations. I’ve personally mastered this and I lead an exceedingly peaceful life idk.
5. Take Consistent Action Toward Your Authentic Self
This is the most important step: Don't ghost yourself. Every time you abandon your desires or compromise your values to please others, you're telling all of creation that you're okay with being abandoned.
Show up for yourself the way you would show up for your best friend. Keep the promises you make to yourself. Take small, consistent actions that align with who you're becoming, not who you think others want you to be.
Instead of: Abandoning your commitments to yourself when others' expectations arise
Do this: Make one small commitment to yourself each day and follow through. It could be as simple as drinking enough water, taking a five-minute walk, or saying no to something that doesn't serve you.
Your Beautifulllll, Self-Centered Summer Awaits
Being self-centered doesn't mean being selfish, it means being centered in your authentic self. It means recognizing that you have a unique purpose and light that only you can shine.
This summer, give yourself permission to be bold. You're a daughter of the Divine, created with intention and purpose. Your authentic self isn't too much, too bright, or too anything—it's exactly what the world needs.
Your challenge for the rest of the summer: Choose one area where you've been people pleasing and commit to showing up authentically instead. Notice how it feels to honor your true self, and watch how the right people are naturally drawn to you.
Remember, transformation is a process, not a destination. Be patient with yourself as you practice these new ways of being.
Your future self, the one who's fully aligned with her purpose and unafraid to take up space, is cheering you on.
I trust myself completely and make decisions that align with my true desires.
I am done people pleasing my way into a life that doesn't belong to me. I choose me.
I take full responsibility for my life and my happiness. No one outside of Christ else gets to dictate my worth or my choices.
reading 📖: Problematic Summer Romance by Ali Hazelwood
eating 🥗: Coke Zero obsession is back unfortunately
playing 🎧: Confidential by Anendlessocean
obsessing 🤠: over my not so secret Tiktok
recommending 💌: not going to a restaurant reccomended by Tiktok 🙄
treating 🌟: this lemon loaf tea with DAIRY milk….a lil lemon and honey omgggggg bomb
you are the privilege in pretty privilege
Here's my thesis, and it might sound controversial: It doesn't matter what you look like. It only matters what you think about what you look like.
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MY DEVOO IS OUTTTTTT !! !!!!!!!!!!
Love you to LIFEEEEEEE,
Zozo